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Writer's pictureGina Bowen

How to Intrinsically Motivate Your Children



Let's face it, we all want this for our kids: intrinsic motivation. This is the kind of motivation that comes from within, driving them to do things because they genuinely want to, not because they’re being rewarded or pressured. Intrinsically motivated kids are more likely to be engaged, persistent, and satisfied with their achievements. So, how do we help our kids develop this kind of motivation? Here are some practical tips:


1. Foster a Growth Mindset


Encourage your kids to see challenges as opportunities to learn and grow, rather than as obstacles. Praise their effort and persistence, not just their successes. When they struggle, remind them that making mistakes is a natural part of learning. This helps them understand that their abilities can improve with effort and time.


2. Encourage Curiosity and Exploration


Give your kids the freedom to explore their interests and passions. Provide a variety of experiences and activities, and let them choose what excites them. Whether it’s sports, music, art, or science, allowing them to follow their curiosity can spark intrinsic motivation.


3. Set Realistic Goals


Help your kids set realistic and achievable goals. Break larger tasks into smaller, manageable steps. This way, they can experience a sense of accomplishment as they achieve each step, which can fuel their motivation to keep going.


4. Provide Autonomy

Give your kids a sense of control over their activities. Allow them to make choices and decisions about what they do and how they do it. This autonomy can boost their sense of ownership and responsibility, making them more motivated to pursue their goals.


5. Create a Supportive Environment

Create an environment where your kids feel safe and supported. Encourage open communication, and listen to their thoughts and feelings without judgment. When they know they have your support, they’re more likely to take risks and pursue their interests.


6. Model Intrinsic Motivation

Be a role model for intrinsic motivation. Let your kids see you engaging in activities you enjoy and pursuing your own goals with enthusiasm. Talk about what you love about these activities and how they make you feel. Your passion and commitment can inspire your kids to develop their own intrinsic motivation.


7. Emphasize the Joy of Learning

Focus on the joy and satisfaction that comes from learning and mastering new skills, rather than external rewards like grades or trophies. Encourage your kids to reflect on what they’ve learned and how they’ve grown, rather than just the outcome.


8. Encourage Self-Reflection

Help your kids reflect on their experiences and what they’ve learned from them. Ask questions like, “What did you enjoy about this activity?” or “What did you learn from this challenge?” This self-reflection can help them recognize their own growth and achievements, boosting their intrinsic motivation.


9. Limit Extrinsic Rewards

While it’s okay to occasionally reward your kids for their efforts, try to limit the use of extrinsic rewards like money or treats. Over-reliance on these rewards can undermine intrinsic motivation. Instead, focus on the intrinsic rewards of the activity itself, such as the joy of learning or the satisfaction of a job well done.


Conclusion


Intrinsic motivation is a powerful force that can drive your kids to pursue their passions and achieve their goals with enthusiasm and persistence. By fostering a growth mindset, encouraging curiosity, providing autonomy, and creating a supportive environment, you can help your kids develop the intrinsic motivation they need to thrive. Here at The Moxy Life, we’re all about empowering families to cultivate resilience, confidence, and independence in their kids. Let’s work together to inspire our kids to embrace their inner drive and create a life they love.

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